DEALING WITH MARITAL CHALLENGES

TITLE: DEALING WITH MARITAL CHALLENGES

By Rev. Samuel Arimoro

Main Text: Ephesians 5:22-33
Supporting Texts: Colossians 3:18-19, 1 Peter 3:1-7, Genesis 2:24

INTRODUCTION:
Marriage is a sacred institution ordained by God, meant to bring joy, companionship, and fulfillment. However, no marriage is immune to challenges. Marital issues can arise from differences in backgrounds, personalities, expectations, or life pressures. This study aims to provide biblical insights and practical steps to address and overcome marital challenges, fostering a strong, loving, and enduring relationship.

1. UNDERSTANDING THE ROOT CAUSES OF MARITAL CONFLICT

a) Unrealistic Expectations
When couples expect perfection or assume that their spouse should fulfill all their needs, disappointments can arise. Realistic expectations are essential for a healthy marriage (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).

b) Communication Breakdowns
Poor communication often leads to misunderstandings and resentment. Learning to communicate openly and lovingly can resolve many issues (Proverbs 18:13).

c) Unforgiveness and Resentment
Holding onto past wrongs can create bitterness in marriage. Forgiveness is necessary for healing and restoration (Ephesians 4:32).

d) Differences in Backgrounds and Values
Cultural, religious, or personal differences can create friction, especially if not handled with respect and understanding (Romans 14:19).

Biblical Example: Abraham and Sarah (Genesis 16:1-6) – Sarah's impatience and Abraham’s compliance led to a conflict that affected their marriage, showing how unresolved issues can escalate.

2. MAINTAINING LOVE AND RESPECT IN MARRIAGE

a) Love as a Foundation
Love is the core of marriage. Husbands and wives are called to love each other deeply, as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25).

b) Respect and Honour
Respect is essential for both partners. Wives are called to respect their husbands, and husbands to honour their wives (1 Peter 3:7).

c) Expressing Appreciation
Regularly expressing gratitude and appreciation strengthens the marital bond and enhances trust (Proverbs 31:28-29).

d) Prioritising Time Together
Spending quality time nurtures intimacy and understanding between spouses (Song of Solomon 2:10-13).

Biblical Example: Priscilla and Aquila (Acts 18:1-3, 18-19, 26) – They worked together as a team, demonstrating love, respect, and unity in both ministry and marriage.

3. FORGIVENESS AND HEALING IN MARRIAGE

a) Letting Go of Past Hurts
Unforgiveness can hinder marital growth. Couples must choose to let go of past wrongs and strive for healing (Colossians 3:13).

b) Seeking Reconciliation
Humility and a willingness to apologise can repair broken trust and restore relationships (Matthew 5:23-24).

c) Praying for One Another
Prayer fosters a spirit of unity and invites God’s healing into the marriage (James 5:16).

d) Being Patient and Understanding
Allowing time for healing and being understanding towards each other’s flaws can renew the marital bond (1 Corinthians 13:4-5).

Biblical Example: Hosea and Gomer (Hosea 3:1-3) – Hosea’s forgiveness toward Gomer reflects God’s love and the possibility of restoration even in difficult circumstances.

4. ESTABLISHING GODLY PRINCIPLES IN MARRIAGE

a) Making God the Center
A marriage rooted in faith is strengthened by God’s wisdom and guidance (Ecclesiastes 4:12).

b) Living in Submission to One Another
Ephesians 5:21 teaches mutual submission, creating a balanced and respectful relationship.

c) Financial Stewardship
Financial disagreements can strain marriages. Practicing financial transparency and stewardship reduces conflict (1 Timothy 6:10).

d) Prioritising Family over External Influences
Protecting the sanctity of marriage by avoiding inappropriate relationships and focusing on family strengthens unity (Genesis 2:24).

Biblical Example: Mary and Joseph (Matthew 1:18-25) – Joseph’s decision to protect and support Mary during challenging times demonstrates commitment and trust in God’s plan.

5. SEEKING COUNSEL AND SUPPORT

a) Seeking Godly Counsel
Consulting wise and experienced individuals can offer fresh perspectives and guidance (Proverbs 11:14).

b) Engaging in Marriage Enrichment Activities
Marriage retreats, seminars, or counselling can be beneficial in strengthening bonds and addressing issues constructively (Proverbs 27:17).

c) Building a Supportive Community
Surrounding the marriage with supportive family and friends creates a positive environment for growth (Galatians 6:2).

d) Setting Boundaries
Establishing boundaries with family, friends, and work helps protect the marriage from unnecessary strain (Genesis 2:24).

Biblical Example: Moses and Zipporah (Exodus 18:13-27) – Jethro’s advice to Moses helped balance his responsibilities, showing the importance of seeking counsel and setting healthy boundaries.

CONCLUSION:
Every marriage will encounter challenges, but with commitment, understanding, and reliance on God’s Word, couples can overcome these difficulties. Applying biblical principles can strengthen the foundation of marriage, helping couples navigate through challenges together. It is vital to keep God at the center, practice forgiveness, communicate openly, and seek support when needed. Marital challenges, when handled wisely, can be a means for growth, maturity, and deeper love.

PRAYER POINTS:

1. Father, thank You for the gift of marriage. Grant us wisdom to handle marital challenges.

2. Lord, strengthen our love for each other and keep us united in all things.

3. Father, teach us to communicate openly, honestly, and lovingly with each other.

4. Help us, Lord, to let go of past hurts and forgive one another completely.

5. Father, grant us the grace to prioritise and protect our marriage from external pressures.

6. Lord, make us a blessing to one another and keep us from any form of resentment.

7. Help us to respect and honour each other as You desire, Lord.

8. Father, guide us to seek godly counsel and support when we need it.

9. Lord, establish our home on Your Word, bringing peace and harmony.

10. Father, may our marriage be a testimony of Your love and faithfulness.

PROPHETIC DECLARATIONS:

1. I declare restoration and peace in every troubled marriage in Jesus’ name.

2. May the spirit of forgiveness and unity dwell in your marriage.

3. I declare divine wisdom and understanding over every couple facing challenges.

4. May every root of bitterness and unforgiveness in your marriage be uprooted.

5. I decree that your marriage shall be a source of joy and fulfillment.

6. May God’s love and guidance surround you and your spouse continually.

7. Every external influence bringing division to your marriage is removed.

8. I declare God’s provision and financial stability in your household.

9. May your marriage grow stronger through every challenge you face together.

10. I declare that your marriage will glorify God and inspire others in Jesus’ name.

SECRETS OF A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE

SECRETS OF A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE

By Rev. Samuel Arimoro

Main Text: Ephesians 5:22-33
Supporting Texts: Genesis 2:24, Proverbs 24:3-4, 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

INTRODUCTION:
Marriage is a sacred institution ordained by God from the beginning of creation. It is meant to be a lifelong union, filled with love, commitment, and mutual respect. However, sustaining a successful marriage requires intentionality, wisdom, and adherence to biblical principles. In this sermon, we will explore the secrets that lead to a thriving and fulfilling marriage, as revealed in Scripture.

1. LOVE AS CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH

a) Selfless Love:
Ephesians 5:25 calls husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church. This love is sacrificial, placing the needs of one’s spouse above personal desires.

b) Unconditional Love:
Love in marriage should not depend on circumstances or feelings. It should be unconditional, just as Christ's love for us is unfailing.

c) Nurturing Love:
Christ’s love is nurturing, helping the Church to grow in purity. Similarly, spouses should support each other’s spiritual and emotional growth.

Biblical Example: Christ’s love for the Church is the ultimate model of love in marriage, a love that forgives, heals, and restores.

2. MUTUAL RESPECT AND HONOUR

a) Respect for Roles:
Ephesians 5:22-24 speaks of the wife’s submission to her husband, which is a form of respect and honour. At the same time, husbands are called to lead with love, not domination.

b) Honouring Each Other’s Value:
1 Peter 3:7 reminds husbands to give honour to their wives as co-heirs of the grace of life. Both partners should recognise each other’s worth and contribution to the marriage.

c) Building Up, Not Tearing Down:
Proverbs 12:4 says a virtuous wife is a crown to her husband. Respecting one another includes speaking life into the marriage and avoiding words or actions that tear down.

Biblical Example: Ruth honoured Boaz, and in turn, he respected and protected her, leading to a prosperous union (Ruth 3:10-11).

3. COMMUNICATION AND UNDERSTANDING

a) Open and Honest Communication:
Communication is key to a successful marriage. Ephesians 4:15 encourages us to speak the truth in love, creating an atmosphere where both partners feel heard and understood.

b) Active Listening:
James 1:19 teaches us to be quick to listen and slow to speak. Listening attentively to your spouse shows respect and fosters understanding.

c) Resolving Conflict Peacefully:
Disagreements are inevitable, but Ephesians 4:26 reminds us not to let anger persist. Healthy communication leads to conflict resolution, which strengthens the bond between spouses.

Biblical Example: Priscilla and Aquila worked together in ministry and likely maintained a strong marriage through effective communication and partnership (Acts 18:2-3).

4. COMMITMENT AND FAITHFULNESS

a) A Covenant, Not a Contract:
Marriage is a covenant before God, not a temporary agreement. Malachi 2:14-15 speaks of God as a witness to the marriage covenant, emphasising the sacredness of this bond.

b) Staying Faithful in All Seasons:
Hebrews 13:4 encourages faithfulness in marriage. Whether in times of joy or difficulty, staying committed to your spouse honours God’s design for marriage.

c) Persevering Through Challenges:
Every marriage will face trials, but Galatians 6:9 urges us not to grow weary in doing good, for in due season, we will reap if we do not give up.

Biblical Example: Despite facing adversity, Isaac and Rebekah remained committed to each other (Genesis 24).

5. FORGIVENESS AND GRACE

a) Being Quick to Forgive:
Colossians 3:13 tells us to forgive one another as Christ forgave us. In marriage, holding on to grudges leads to bitterness, but forgiveness restores peace and unity.

b) Showing Grace in Imperfection:
No spouse is perfect, and we must extend grace in times of failure or misunderstanding. Ephesians 4:32 encourages us to be kind and tenderhearted, showing grace as God has shown us.

c) Rebuilding Trust:
Forgiveness is the first step toward restoring trust after hurt. Patience and consistent love help to rebuild and strengthen the relationship.

Biblical Example: Hosea’s forgiveness and restoration of his wife, Gomer, after her unfaithfulness is a powerful example of grace and reconciliation (Hosea 3:1-3).

6. PRAYER AND SPIRITUAL UNITY

a) Praying Together as a Couple:
A marriage centred on God thrives when both partners come together in prayer. Matthew 18:19 promises that where two agree in prayer, God’s will is done. Make prayer a regular part of your relationship.

b) Growing Together Spiritually:
Spiritual unity is vital for marital success. Couples should encourage each other in their faith and pursue God’s will together. 1 Corinthians 7:5 highlights the importance of spiritual intimacy in marriage.

c) Depending on God for Wisdom:
James 1:5 reminds us that God gives wisdom to those who ask. A successful marriage depends on God’s wisdom for handling challenges and making decisions.

Biblical Example: Zechariah and Elizabeth, though facing the trial of childlessness, continued in faith and prayer, and God blessed them in their marriage (Luke 1:5-7).

CONCLUSION:
A successful marriage requires love, respect, communication, commitment, forgiveness, and prayer. When couples build their relationship on the foundation of God’s Word and seek to honour Him in all they do, they will experience the blessings of a joyful and lasting union. As you apply these biblical secrets, may your marriage be strengthened and flourish according to God’s perfect design.

PRAYER POINTS:
1. Lord, teach me to love my spouse as Christ loves the Church.

2. Father, help us to communicate openly and honestly in our marriage.

3. Lord, give us the grace to forgive each other and extend mercy in times of failure.

4. Father, grant us the strength to stay committed and faithful to one another.

5. Lord, let Your peace reign in our marriage and remove every source of conflict.

6. Father, bless our marriage with spiritual unity and help us to grow together in You.

7. Lord, protect our marriage from any attack of the enemy and give us victory.

8. Father, help us to be an example of a godly marriage to others.

9. Lord, let our home be filled with joy, love, and Your presence.

10. Father, bless our marriage with fruitfulness and favour in every area of life.

PROPHETIC DECLARATIONS:
1. I declare that your marriage will be filled with Christ-like love and peace.

2. Every plan of the enemy to disrupt your marriage is cancelled in Jesus’ name.

3. Your marriage shall be a testimony of God’s grace and favour.

4. I declare that you will experience growth and success in every aspect of your relationship.

5. Every misunderstanding in your marriage will turn into greater unity and love.

6. The spirit of forgiveness and grace shall abound in your home.

7. I declare that you will walk in spiritual unity, praying and seeking God together.

8. Your marriage will be a reflection of God’s perfect design and His glory will shine through.

9. You will overcome every challenge and emerge stronger in your relationship.

10. I declare that your marriage will be blessed, fruitful, and successful in all things.